Monday, September 17, 2007

It's in full blown gambling mode . .

The autumn air is feeling crisp, we are less than a month into the football season, both college and NFL, and my gambling habit is in full blown misery. The 2 factors to come out of this weekend are as follows:

1. Notre Dame is officially THAT team . . every fall there is a team in collegiate or professional football that absolutely blows, you need to make some money back from your early losses, just bet against that team because you know it's a lock no matter what, you know it, they know it, and vegas knows it, by weak ten they'll be getting more points than you can think of. This year's team is the Fighting Irish, the service academies are going to be the only teams they can come close to beating, and that's not even a guarentee. I lose because Wisconsin can't cover against F'n THE CITADEL, but it's ok, i ponyed up and took Michigan at home, and I was actually really confident in Lloyd Carr's ability . . . . . JUST KIDDING, I was actually just really confident that Notre Dame sucks and Oregon was just alot better than f'n Michigan the week before. Has than ever been a team that gets more hype when they win than Notre Dame, that's why i feel fairly okay with piling on them when they lose. At least we know one thing is for sure, this video tape thing doesn't reach much further than "the hoodie" because the Fighting Irish and coach Weiss havent' scored an offensive touchdown in three games, even when Michigan put the second team in they couldn't move the ball, if theyd' been video taping sidelines and learning the signals, you'd at least get lucky once or twice and score. So for all you head coaches, when you lose your offensive coordinator, just get a sony hand held camera for a replacement.

2. Matt Ryan is officially a Heisman Candidate . . .I know I know, before i get the piling on from my friends about how I didn't even go to Boston College, and He plays in the ACC, and how they think I have a man crush on the guy, which i might, Let me tell you a couple statistics:
In two of his three games so far this season, hes had over 30 completions, to go along with his 985 yards passing in three weeks, and 7 touchdown passes. He just got finished whipping Georgia Tech's secondary, Beating his former coach in the head last week, and beating defending ACC Champion Wake Forest in week 1. The next three weeks he has extremely easy games all at home, in which case he will start seriously padding his statistics before he rolls onto Notre Dame (which for all intensive purposes will be a blood bath) then they have a thursday night game in Blacksburg, which will be the ESPN game that will put him right into the spotlight and ready to make the late season run where he really becomes that front running type of candidate. Finishing the season off games against big time programs, Clemson, Florida State, & Miami. you can voice your complaints at mailto:knowyourrolltoolbox@hestherealdeal.

Now to my misery . .the NFL, I'd make a list of thing that drove me crazy yesterday but then i'd probably develop a migrain. So i'll just recap a few of the games that I watched and try to pretend like I wasn't screaming at the television like a complete addict. P.S. you know it's bad when your hoping by some stroke of genious Kyle Boller goes long and throws it when they are trying to kill the clock, just so you can win by ten and a half points. Then again, it is Kyle Boller, its not that far fetched that he'd make a mistake and do that, but it'd probably just picked off anyway.

1. Indy @ Tennessee . . .I love these titans, I'm still not over the fact that I can't watch PacMan Jones actually do the thing that makes him money, but I do get to watch him wrestle so I guess it balances. Indy is nasty, but the Titans are just one of those teams that gives them problems, they are young, athletic, and play with wreckless abandon at all times, Vince Young leads that team in only his second year, and plays alot better than I thought he would coming out of college. Synopsis, everyone who bet on Indy giving all those points, is pissed off, just like I am, but what else could I have thouht? they just embarassed New Orleans, held the best ground game to 77 yards. Any Given Sunday i guess.

2. NYJ @ Baltimore . . .I hate the Jets, I mean passionately I hate the Jets, I hate watching them play, I hate Mangini that hack on the sidelines, I hate Jet Fans, and for anyone who knows me, they finish a close second or third to Colt Brennan and Hawaii as to who I can't stand more in football. The fans are rediculous, my buddy roche said it right, they cheered for a quarterback, they've never seen play, I get it, Howdie Doody is your QB, but do you really have to boo the piss out of the guy the minute he gets hurt, he was actually playing good. But thats what NEW YORK fans do, they are un-intelligent, un-original, and fairweather. They at their all week and clamored for this guy to start at quarterback, HE WAS GOING TO PLAY RAY LEWIS AND THE RAVENS DEFENSE, it takes balls to even call a snap when Ray Lewis is in front of you, remember what TO said "Ray Lewis, double murder case, and I'm the bad guy?" thats what Chad Pennington was saying " Kyle Clemons, and I'm the bad guy?" eventually the guy was going to screw up and throw a pick, and the game would be over . . . . that happened, in the end zone no less, and this time Baltimore wasn't filming the sidelines, so now Mangini can't pawn off another loss, and when they start off 0-6 and everyones sexy pick for the playoffs is shot to hell, i'm going to laugh my ass off. That is why their favorite time of the year is the NFL draft, the only team who loves the draft more is the Portland Trailblazers . . . .small joke.
3. Cincy @ Cleveland . . .I'm not laughing about this, it wasn't funny to me, I didn't get to see Chad Johnson jump into the dog pound, which would have been the highlight of the season if you ask me. Carson Palmer threw for more touchdowns than Jonathan Moxon did in Varsity Blues, and Cleveland actually won a game before the Brady Quinn era starts in Week 10. Not only did Cleveland win the game, they scored 51 points, on the hands of Derek Anderson who went to school at . . . . .EXACTLY MY POINT. Cincy's defense which forced 6 turnovers against Baltimore allowed the 35 year old lineman cor, and ex-con Jamal Lewis to rush for 200 yards, the only thing that would have made it more unbelievable is if The Rock came in and played the second half on a bum leg, which is what he will do inevitably in his next movie. What Kevin Costner is to baseball movies, The Rock is to pathetic football movies which never seem to actually work. This game is the real life version of the "No F'n Way" game which happens in video football at least twice a year to break up your undefeated season.
6 more weeks till the PACMAN is eligible

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