Thursday, July 19, 2007

Ode to Steven A.

That's it, I'm all in, if voting for someone to take over for Dan Patrick on the mid-afternoon Big Show on ESPN RADIO is like voting for the MLB all-star game, I'm voting 1,000 times, just like I did for Hideki Okajima, for Steven A. Smith. That's if he'll give up the general hospital role (by the way never try and get a picture for your blog of steven a. smith from google images, the results are eighty, 40-year old fat white guys who work in accounting with random companies throughout california, who'd have thought steven smith was a popular name?) Not only would this be the greatest three hours of radio on the air, but millions of Americans would drive right off the road after hearing how the New York Knicks drafted Ronaldo Balkman with the 21st pick in the 2006 NBA Draft. "BALKMAN, THIS IS ABSURD, BALKMAN" (p.s. after he was selected he said to the New York Media, "even I was surprised to go this high in the draft") now we wonder why Isaiah got fired . . . . . . . . oh wait, you mean he didnt? Since I fully support Steven A. Smith for the job, I'm going to give you the three reasons why:

1. Radio Voice . . all the greats, howard stern, rush limbaugh, even imus (who i'm sure woudln't be invited to guest host the show when Steven A. was on vacation) you could tell their voices after listening to them for 10 miliseconds, you don't confuse their voices with anyone else which is key when hosting a radio show, thats how people know WHO you are, considering they can't see you and all. HE already hosts a show in NEW YORK CITY so he's got a very solid fan base and the over exposure of ESPN has given him the opportunity to have his own television show for a period of time (which should still be on in my opinion, quite frankly) could you mistake Steven A's voice for anyone else? "BREAKING NEWS, IT IS UNBELIEVABLE AND QUITE FRANKLY I'M ASTONISHED AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE NEWS IS YET"

2. Shaq . .known to be a guest on his former television show, the opportunity to have Shaquille O'Neal on the radio at any given time is a major plus, the only other way we could guarentee his appearences is to have a weekly spot with Dan Lebatard, who is very much like Pedro Gomez is to Barry Bonds . "it's the diesel on espn radio fools" "SHAQ MY BOY IS IN THE HOUSE MAKING A RUN AT ANOTHER RING THIS YEAR OR WHAT BIG FELLA" Steven A. Smith is already good with ESPN and he'd be able to bring in some of his big name guests that love to talk the real deal with the legend.

3. BECAUSE MY LUNCH BREAK IS TO BORING . . .After reading the 19 page indictment of Mr. Michael Vick, I headed to lunch, where FINALLY someone agreed with me it was. STEVEN A. we should hold of judgement until after he is found guilty, if the evidence is so favored in one way you don't just throw a man in jail, you have a trial, and THEY throw the man in jail, or he gets off scott free (kinda of like OJ) . But the reason why I say it is because Steven A. has no problem with taking a stand on something even if he is wrong, he still takes a stand and draws a line in the sand that is for sure. I'm on a lunch break for 30 minutes, it's espn radio so at least twelve minutes is eaten up by commercials for progressive direct, which isn't even offered in massachusetts, so I do require the other 18 minutes be filled with entertaining radio, QUITE FRANKLY.

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